Thursday, June 25, 2009

Da Hunger


The Hunger is a freaky movie! I love vampire movies, because The Vampire, as character and theme, is age old and hilarious in terms of cultural significance and signifier.

Released in 1983, starring Catherine Deneuve, David Bowie, and a tittie-baring Susan Sarandon (what more could one ask for), The Hunger is bizarre in the sense that these are vampires dying, and not by a silver stake and human hand. In the beginning of the film, David Bowie's vampire is dying from an unexplained complication despite being promised by his lover, Deneuve, that he would live forever when she initiated him. He contacts a scientist played by Sarandon who is studying aging in monkeys in hopes of discovering a cure for a disease that causes rapid aging in children. Essentially he wants a cure for the rapid aging he is suddenly experiencing. No amount of fresh blood can set back his internal clock, stuck in permanent fast forward. He presumably dies and Deneuve takes on Sarandon as her new vampire disciple in a classic lesbian-vampire love bond. Sarandon then eats her overbearing, controlling, demeaning, mean boyfriend/husand/whatever he is (! !!) when he comes searching for her at the lesbian-vampire manse. Then Deneuve goes pSyChO on Sarandon and in a fit of passion sucks her little lover a tad too dry.

***SPOILER ALERT*** The bizarrest bizarre surprise of all: Bowie is not dead, just undead, an undead vampire zombie, AND HE IS UGLY AND PISSED, and he and all the other lovers that Deneuve has forsaken in her promise of eternal life rise and throw Deneuve down a bajillion flights of stairs and as she falls she thrashes about in what seems like sexual ecstasy until her beautiful face (gosh, Catherine Deneuve is unbelievably beautiful and so sexy) turns into an hideous, scary skull face and POOF she turns to a pile of dust and hair.

And of course, the convention of all conventions, especially in the horror genre, especially in the vampire genre, Sarandon has not died either. She has skipped town, shipped off to London, and she has taken the place of her former lover, Deneuve, as the initiator of innocents into the (lesbian) vampire lifestyle, lured with the promise of eternal life and beauty and gratifying sexual conquest.

It's for US

Fed Ex dude walking behind me: "Is that a baby being carried away by balloons on your leg?" (referring to the tattoo on my calf)

Me: "Oh, no. It's an illustration from The Little Prince. Ever read it?"

Fed Ex dude: "No."

Me: "Yea, well, the little boy is actually a prince."

Fed Ex dude: "But are those balloons?"

Me: "They are birds. The book is very good. You should read it. It is a children's book but it's very beautiful, very existential."

Fed Ex dude: "Oh, I see, like The Family Guy."

Me
: "Well, not exactly like The Family Guy."

Fed Ex dude: "I mean, it's a cartoon, but it's for US."

Tuesday, June 23, 2009

Rain on your college ass disco dorm


Biggie is wasted.

Monday, June 22, 2009

Is it a baby?

7 Pounds is a freaky movie and Will Smith is a scientologist.

Thursday, June 18, 2009

QUICKER PICKER UPPER

On this otherwise completely shitty day, something to start it off right:


If yr game is strong, give me a call, Boo.

I AM SICK OF WALKING THE DOGS!!!

Tuesday, June 16, 2009

S.O.S.

After several weeks of wondering, and asking Jen atleast twice, I am no closer to knowing the truth.

It seems as though Abba definitely recorded an album in Spanish, as well as many singles, in languages other than their native Swedish by learning the lyrics phonetically, but I've found no concrete proof of their having learned their English lyrics with this method. Perhaps they learned some of their English songs phonetically initially, but Sweden is a country with a high percentage of English fluency and eventually Abba would conduct interviews in English, so... Someone, please, solve my mystery! This will plague me until my death.


"S.O.S. has a number of musical fans: John Lennon and Pete Townshend had both declared that it was one of their favourite pop songs."

In my research on the subject, I also discovered this freak who was in love with Frida. Also, you know who else loves Abba...


WOOF.

Wednesday, June 10, 2009

L8 to the game, AGAIN

Another post that I've been meaning to write for a while...

Don't know if y'all listen to as much Top 40 Rap and R&B as I do, but if you regularly tune yr dial in to Hot 97 when you get home from a long day of work like I do, then I'm sure yr familiar with a little diddy by the name of She Got Her Own by Ne-yo, featuring Jamie Foxx and Fabolous.

While the title and an initial listen might lead you to believe this is a feminist jam, I contend there is nothing further from it.

Let's look at the lyrics:
She Got Her Own (ft Jamie Foxx & Fabolous ) Lyrics

[Intro]
A dedication...
To the independent woman
To the one working hard for hers
This is just my way of letting you know...
I see you baby.
And I brought a friend of mine to help me show
My appreciation the right way
Ladies...Mr. Jaime Foxx
Mr. Foxx...ladies

(remix)

[Jamie Foxx]

I love her cause she got her own
She don't need mine, so she leave mine alone
There ain't nothing that's more crazy
Than a girl that want but don't need me (oh!)
Young independent, yea she work hard
But you can't tell from the way that she walk
She don't slow down 'cause she ain't got time
To be complaining, shawty gone shine
She don't expect nothing from no guy
She plays aggressive, but she still shy
But you never know her softer side
By lookin' in her eyes....
Knowin' she can do for herself
Makes me wanna give her my wealth
Only kinda girl I want
Independent queen workin' for her throne
I love her cause she got her own...
She got her own
I love her cause she got her own
She got her own
I love it when she say
It's cool I got it, I got it, I got it
I love it when she say
It's cool I got it, I got it, I got it

(remix)

[Ne-Yo]

I love her cause she got her own
She don't need mine, so she leave mine alone
There ain't nothin' that's more sexy
Than a girl that want, but don't need me
Lovely face
Nice thick thighs
Plus she got drive that matches my drive
Sexy Thang
She stay fly
All the while payin' her bills on time
She don't look at me like Captain save 'em
Gold Diggin, no she don't do that

Now she look at me like inspiration
She wanna be complimentin' my swag
And everything she got, she worked for it,
Good life made for it
She take pride in sayin' that she paid for it

Only kind of girl I want
Independent queen workin' for her throne
I love her cause she got her own
She got her own
I love her cause she got her own
She got her own
I love it when she say
It's cool I got it, I got it, I got it
She say
Uh Uh, I got it, I got it, I got it

Fab: When shorty come around they call her "I got it"
She won't even let you put your hands in your pocket
Haha...
Gotta love that though
Loso! Case you ain't know so baby...

[Fabolous]

Don't make me laugh boo
Never did that bad to
Make you even have to
But even if I had to
Ask my better half to
You be more than glad to
When I do that math boo
You always try to add two
I need someone who'd ride for me
Not someone who'd ride for free

She said boy I don't just ride, She'll pull up beside of me
I had to ask her what she doin' in that caddy
She said "cause you my baby I be stuntin' like my daddy"
And there's not many, who catch my eye
We both wearing gucci, she match my fly
And that's why I, Suppose to keep her closer
Right by the side, Toaster in the holster
And now she wit Loso,
'Case you didn't know so
You can save your money dawg shorty getting dough so
What she care wit his cars, you can call her miss boss
I got it backwards, criss cross, shorty got her own

[Jamie Foxx]

Now all my ladies that dont need a man for nothing, except some of that good lovin let me here you say
oooo oooo oooo oooo

[Ne-Yo]

Now all my fellas know you need to stop the frontin if you love an independent woman let me hear you say
oooo oooo oooo oooo


I love her cause she got her own
got her own
I love her cause she got her own
she got her own
I love it when she say
It's cool I got it, I got it, I got it
I love it when she say
Uh Uh, I got it, I got it, I got it

These dudes sound more relieved that this girl isn't trying to spend their money than the fact that "she's got her own". Not only that, but it sounds a lil bit like they are trying to freeload off her for a while, which doesn't seem like a humdinger of a role reversal to me. While not all women are breadwinners in their relationships/families, women have traditionally been caretakers/the backbone of the family, probably since the beginning of time. Men looking toward (more like demanding) women for a lil help has been the relationship dynamic writ large for, uh, ever.

And, man, Jamie Foxx, on a role with misogynist hits this summer. Blame It On the Alcohol is basically a song about date rape. Let's look at some of those lyrics for a second:

She said she usually don't (don't don't), but I know that she front (front front)
'cause shawty know what she want, but she don't wanna seem like she's easy
I ain't saying what you wanna do, but you know we probly gon' do what you been feenin deep in si-ah-ah-ide, girl let it out now

Know what you drinkin, go on let it sink in,
Here for the weekend, thinkin, we can see where we can be if we press fast forward
Just one more round if your down I'm for it
Fill another cup up, feelin on your but what
You don't even care now
, i was unaware of how fine you was before my buzz set in, my buzz set in

Tsk, tsk.
He should be ashamed of himself.

And then T-Pain admits to a girl peeing on him:

Shawty got drunk, thought it all was a dream
So I made her say i, i, i
Now she got her hand on my legs, got my seats all wet in my ride (all wet in my ride)
All over my ride (all over my ride)

Classy.


Now, if you really, really want to listen to some quality Rap and R&B about independent women, look no further:

I wish I could find the official video. It is 'naners.

OR YOU COULD JUST WATCH THE VIDEO FOR THE BEST INDEPENDENT LADIES JAM.
Girl, I didn't know you could get down like that.